My son will be 4 this year and he is very bright. He’s constantly asking questions, making up stories, etc. Although I do not often compare him to other children his age, I do find that he is not interested in learning letters of the alphabet nor is he really interested in numbers. He is more willing to play games with numbers and can count very well, however does not want to write the numbers. I am not particularly worried at this stage as I know how quickly they can sap up information, but I wonder whether I should still persevere with the written formats as I do not want to make it into a chore. I have noticed that if he has his cousin Libby around the house (who can write and string together words) he does tend to try to write the first letter of his name to show me what he can do. He goes to private nursery four days a week, which is Ofstead registered and has an Investors in People award who seem to have a structured day for learning by play. Any suggestions for helping his writing as he seems frustrated that he cannot read words from books and gets quite upset until I read them.

Thanks for writing—it was good to hear from you and your email made me smile at the end. I love hearing how you are so willing to work with your child, and I’m glad to hear you say that you think he’s bright. Every mother should think that they’re child is just brilliant (as they all are, in one area or another)!

Anyway, to your questions. I wouldn’t be alarmed at his lack of interest. Everybody develops his or her language skills at very different times. Allowing him his own timetable will save you both a lot of frustration. Girls traditionally mature quicker than boys, and your son is not yet 4. I teach a 4 and 5-year-old preschool class and many of my boys aren’t interested yet that this squiggle is “s,” they just want to play with their trucks! They all eventually get there by the end of the school year.

In your case, I bet you’ll start to see a lot more curiosity and ability as he matures during this coming 4-year-old year. His writing will drastically improve as the fine little muscles in his hands begin to be better developed and stronger. Get him some scissors and let him cut to his heart’s content. That will help his hands develop strength and skill.

Reading to him is wonderful! That is a great help for pre-readers. When he starts to exhibit curiosity in his name, how to write it, what letters are in it, what letters are in your name, daddy’s name, on the cereal box, etc., then that’s a pretty good sign that he’s ready to start putting the letters and sounds together. It sounds like you’re doing a terrific job. Keep up the good work and enjoy the process of working and learning with your child.