I babysit with a 6-year-old child who is going to be repeating kindergarten this year. I have been keeping him since late May. I have 30 years of experience as a pediatric nurse and believe this child may be ADHD but his parents have been very reluctant to have him tested because the father does not want him “gorked out” on medication. Do most children with ADHD have this much difficulty learning? And if they do, what can I do to help him?

There is no short answer for this question, but I’ll try. Yes, children with ADHD can have tremendous trouble learning to read. I have many children in my school who have been diagnosed with ADD and ADHD. Some of their parents seek medical attention, and the results are quite remarkable, some of them do not. It is an ongoing discussion, and is a very personal parental choice. Keeping in very close contact with their pediatrician will be very important for them as he/she will be able to keep them abreast of the latest medical ideas and information. Also the Internet and parental support groups will be VERY beneficial. Staying informed and educated is the best tool you and they can have.

I frequently have parents who are afraid to seek medical attention for their child’s behavioral issues because they feel it somehow reflects back on their parental abilities. I try to explain to them that if their child broke their arm, they wouldn’t withhold medical treatment to repair their child’s limb, even if it meant multiple surgeries, medications, and long-term treatments. Yet somehow, they are willing to withhold medical advice and treatment for just as crippling of a problem.

That said, I can tell you that we have tremendous success with all of our children using a phonics program. It is extremely easy to understand and is very parent friendly. The biggest problem you will have is keeping his attention on the learning at hand, and then helping him to retain that information. That is probably the biggest argument for medication with ADHD children. It helps even out their learning abilities and attention spans. Again, a very personal choice—do your homework, and encourage this child’s parents to do theirs. Eighteen years of negative reinforcement from schoolteachers and classmates is, in my opinion, more damaging to a child than 18 years of medication that has some pretty remarkable results to its credit.

There are several versions of medication out there and they each have different side effects and related issues–again information will be your best tool. Encourage his parents to become informed, very informed about all the issues related to this and other behavioral/learning disabilities. ADHD seldom travels alone and if he’s struggling in one area, there are usually other related learning issues. Good luck working with him, and bless you for loving him enough to ask questions about his welfare.