My child turned six years old this May. He is promoted to the 1st grade, but his interest in doing schoolwork is not so good. He is a great child, quiet most of the time in class, and he does his work. But, he occasionally dazes off from doing his work in class and home. In class, he responds as if he is afraid that his answers might be wrong. So, he says it with hesitation with a low voice and shyness. He seems to be stiff in class. Not loose like some kids who are outspoken. How can I get my child to open up in the classroom and talk to his teacher with confidence? How can I get him motivated in doing and concentrate on his work? I know he can do the work. So does his teacher. Please help!

Without knowing your child, it’s difficult to answer your questions conclusively. But I see lots of kids in a school year, and here are a few suggestions that may help.

First of all, a long talk (several a year if needed) with your child’s teacher is in order. Is he naturally shy/timid? Is there a silent bully that he’s afraid of? Is he afraid of the teacher? Does he act this way with other adults/children? Does it take him a long time to play in group? Does it take him a long time to make friends? You need to decide what are personality tendencies and what are environmental issues (things that can be fixed in class). A healthy discussion with his teacher is the first place to start. You may even wish to observe for a few days in his school–watch his interaction with the teacher and with the other students. Why does he seem to be so self-conscious? Some children are naturally shy and reserved–that is their personality and working with it, instead of against it will make all parties involved much happier. Now that doesn’t mean that just because he’s shy or withdrawn that we don’t expect anything from him, not at all, there is work to be done, and we must do it. But pushing a shy/withdrawn child into situations that may be truly terrifying for them or extremely uncomfortable won’t be successful.

Secondly, I would visit a pediatrician and make sure that everything your child needs for learning physically is in order. Are his eyes focusing properly? Can he hear through all the normal ranges of hearing for a child his age? Are his blood levels and chemistry at normal levels and functioning properly?

Sometimes, just making the teacher aware that he’s daydreaming is enough. A gentle call back to reality may be all that is needed to refocus him on the task at hand. When working at home, keep his homework times short and sweet. Work for 10 minutes and on his math homework, and then let him have a break, then come back and refocus again later. It makes for a longer homework time, but maybe that’s all he can stand at one time. Especially after having spent 6 hours in school already. Spreading it over the evening might make it last longer, but maybe there will be less battles in the long run. Hopefully, that might give you a few ideas to try. Good luck and enjoy working with your child.